Friday, April 1, 2011

Strawberry Shortcake Murder

It appears Strawberry Shortcake will meet her baker.

In what I regard as a cheap sales ploy in response to sagging sales, American Greetings toy and licensing division has announced an upcoming special in which Strawberry Shortcake will be murdered. Haven't we had enough of these "murders?" We all know that Strawberry Shortcake will be knocked off only to be revived six months later just like Captain America and Superman. After all she will star in the upcoming 2012 movie, Strawberry Shortcake: Served Cold. The title really gives it away for me. As a big fan of Strawberry Shortcake, this kind of cheap sales gimmick really reveals how little respect American Greetings has for the character.

The only question I have is who will do the deed? Could it be that Raspberry Tart finally shows her true colors? Plum Puddin' is a prime candidate in my book - he/she has always been a little suspect after he/she first showed up as a dude and then without explanation became a female. Orange Blossom is another likely suspect - she came from the Big Apple and we all know about the state of morality in big cities. Certainly nobody would suspect Angel Cake, but doesn't that make her the perfect suspect? Or, perhaps, the Purple Pie Man is finally able to give Strawberry Shortcake her just desserts.

American Greetings, you should be ashamed of yourself for stooping so low. Strawberry Shortcake and her legion of fans deserve better. If you feel like being depressed, check it out at http://www.indiebound.org/book/9780763648770.

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